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One of the things this journey has shown me is that there is a chance that I may not get what I want.  No, this isn’t me giving up.  But I have learned that I think apart of this process is learning to accept myself for who I am.

One thing about trying on wedding dresses is you learn that you can be over weight but in the right type of dresses you can look very pretty… Below a few of my favorites from a recent trip.





Now, call me bias but when I see those pictures I don’t think of a 300lb woman but a woman who looks beautiful in a beautiful dress (well, except my hair and weird face expressions which don’t make me look very pretty but let’s ignore that).  Again it’s a process.

I am an observer by heart.  It’s who I am.  I have always noticed others and thought “why can’t I look like that?”  Even as a plus sized woman I see other plus sized ladies well dressed and think “I wouldn’t look good in that.”

While I don’t still LOVE my body and would LOVE to change it.  I am learning that being big doesn’t mean I have to look and feel frumpy.  It’s challenging because it’s not like I have loads of money for a wardrobe.  But, I want to feel good about myself and as superficial as it may sound wearing something that makes you feel good does tons for the self-esteem.

I think I am slowly learning what this whole process is about.  Sometimes I wonder if I am learning some grand life lesson?  Who knows?  All I do know is I think slowly and surely I am learning to love and accept me as me.  As my blog says “I am not just a fat girl” and I’m not.

I am a mother, a soon to be wife, I am a singer (well not a professional and well, probably not that great), I am a writer, and I am a woman who is strong-willed that fights for what she wants.  I know at the end of the day despite what happens to my body that I can still like my self big OR small 🙂

Don’t ever let your size define you!