One of the things this journey has shown me is that there is a chance that I may not get what I want. No, this isn’t me giving up. But I have learned that I think apart of this process is learning to accept myself for who I am.
One thing about trying on wedding dresses is you learn that you can be over weight but in the right type of dresses you can look very pretty… Below a few of my favorites from a recent trip.
Now, call me bias but when I see those pictures I don’t think of a 300lb woman but a woman who looks beautiful in a beautiful dress (well, except my hair and weird face expressions which don’t make me look very pretty but let’s ignore that). Again it’s a process.
I am an observer by heart. It’s who I am. I have always noticed others and thought “why can’t I look like that?” Even as a plus sized woman I see other plus sized ladies well dressed and think “I wouldn’t look good in that.”
While I don’t still LOVE my body and would LOVE to change it. I am learning that being big doesn’t mean I have to look and feel frumpy. It’s challenging because it’s not like I have loads of money for a wardrobe. But, I want to feel good about myself and as superficial as it may sound wearing something that makes you feel good does tons for the self-esteem.
I think I am slowly learning what this whole process is about. Sometimes I wonder if I am learning some grand life lesson? Who knows? All I do know is I think slowly and surely I am learning to love and accept me as me. As my blog says “I am not just a fat girl” and I’m not.
I am a mother, a soon to be wife, I am a singer (well not a professional and well, probably not that great), I am a writer, and I am a woman who is strong-willed that fights for what she wants. I know at the end of the day despite what happens to my body that I can still like my self big OR small 🙂
Don’t ever let your size define you!