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I will admit through out this past year I keep hoping my issue with weight loss is ME.  While, I have been able to lose here and there it doesn’t seem to stay.  I still though keep wanting to prove me wrong and so here we are.

I am not sure if I told you guys but we moved our wedding date.  We were suppose to get married in October but moved it June of 2014 as I talked about on my other blog.  Anyways, we did so for financial reasons and I feel really good about this.

This past week I counted the weeks.  That’s 58 weeks from now.  My secret goal is to lose 100lbs.  While it seems like a lot of weight (because it is) when you break it down it’s not so bad (about 1.7lb loss a week).  However, logically I will be happy for even 50lbs at this point!

I would *LIKE* to be a size 18 by the time we have the wedding.  But again with my health issues I am going to be open with all this.  There is no this or else.  I am just going along with goals in between (like my first major has been to get under 280 and stay under!).

So what am I doing to make this possible.  I am going to RELAX… I decided to make sure everyday I do some sort of exercise if I can but I have to at least work out 5 days a week.  I have found that when I do lose it’s ALWAYS when I am working out along of course with diet.

Second, diet…. My plan for that is simple.  Just eat less.  When I eat something I tell myself I have to eat half of what I normally would.  I’m not sure how well this will work (Though it worked great for my dad) but I feel it’s worth a try.  I think portions are a big deal.

I also know at times I can be an over eater.  So we shall see.  On Friday I will start back with the weigh in’s but I will have to keep mental notes about PMS and ovulation.  For the past year I ALWAYS have gained during this time but I always lose once AF arrives.  I need to just remind myself this during those times.

That way I won’t be so hard on me.

Last, I can’t say F it… I have and lord do I suck at challenges I am challenging myself to not say F it.  I can’t just say this plan isn’t working and just quit and do something else.  I have to just keep going and IF nothing is working then I just have to keep pushing with the doctors to find out WHY!

I have started making myself a bit more active by scheduling work outs’ with my online moms weight loss group I manage.  oh and um yeah, I am doing a Mud run 5k on September 7th.  This will be my first race EVER! Can you believe it? Not me!

One of the moms in my group wanted to go, I mentioned how D and I would love to try a race but funds are low.  Well, she opted to challenge me that if she paid I would go.  I accepted… EEEEKKKK…. After seeing the obstacles I totally had a what the F did I get myself into.  But ya know what.  even if I am the biggest person there I will do it 🙂

Here is the run I am doing – http://www.mudfactor.com/ I am excited, scared you name it!!!! Oh and we have a team which we have named ourselves the Dirty P.H.A.T Girls 🙂 (any tips on this race would be totally appreciated).

I will not give up on me….

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